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Profile Nicholas 5thSept Virgo Music Click to help Tagboard archives
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Affiliates *My BLOGSHOP Alvin Amelia Chermaine Claria Esther Jaslyn Jassmine Jia qi Jolene Joshua Jun Ming KahKiong Kaiping Kristi Meizhen Nicole Phebe Samuel Shirlyn Siming Teresa Veron Vivien Xidi Xiuling Yang Zi Yong Rong Ziyi Credits You have to thank these guys for making such a Designer is CRUSHthespeaker . Designer's blog is here . Host is obviously blogger . |
Sep 24, 2007 1:32 AM What was I thinking? Why in the world did I ever stuff that stupid cigarette into my mouth? Why can't I resist the temptation? Why did I try to harm my own body? Why must I make myself miserable? Why did I have the thought of being a flirt? Why must I make myself suffer while she's enjoying her life? Why am I so foolish? Why must I hurt myself because of her? Why am I so immature? Why can't I think? Why did I give Khai Yin a chance to lecture me? Why must I let my friends to worry about me? Why can't I grow up? Why did I even bother to let my tears flow? Why did I look back for? I shouldn't have tried peeping back as its pointless.
Hours ago, I've have the foolish thought of being someone I'm not, a flirt. After chatting with quite a number of my friends I'm finally awake now. If I ever turn to a flirt then the Nicholas they knew will be gone. Nicholas is a person who's serious about relationship and thats makes me who I am. Nicholas is someone who will get up no matter how many times he fall and not being beaten by such small stuff. My friends prefer the Nicholas who's always happy go lucky and not someone who keeps looking back. They prefer the Nicholas who will not do harm to himself instead of the Nicholas who smokes, drinks and cuts. But no matter how much they try to help by consoling me and giving me advises there's still a limit to it as I'm the one who chooses my own path. I'm the one who makes the final decision. Though she brought hope to me when I was in despair, thought she show me a ray of light when I was lost in darkness, though she give me love when I'm unloved but now she's taken away my hope, my only ray of light and last but not least she took away my love. I'm once again in despair, once again lost in darkness and once again unloved but I'll not give up. I'll find hope, light and love somewhere in this world! I'll find someone who deserve my love! Today may be a ending to all this happiness, sadness and pain but in the meanwhile its also a beginning of a new chapter of my life...... |
