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My first cartel outing

Pictures taken on 29JAN08.
Lunch with Cartel Colleagues.

Time after time
I try to forget
The day we kissed
And the day we met

I can't handle
Thinking of you
Because i thought
Our love was true

I'm telling the truth
When i say this
I don't blame you
for that last kiss

There was nothing
That i could say
To make you love
To make you stay

I guess it was just
One of those things
You obviously thought
It was just a fling

I've worked my way
Through all the pain
But i will never
Be the same

So now and forever
You'll stay in my mind
You'll stay in my heart
Till the end of time ©

*Gem*

Copyright©GemmaStott2005

I'm really not emoing. I'm seriously not emoing. Trust me. Just publishing some photos that I've found in the net. Hoping that it can express the mixed feelings and doubts that I failed to express using texts.

为什么相爱的人不能在一起

每当我在与你相起你的时候
不知道你在哪头
心里面有许多许的爱与愁
不知是否是永远的伤口
当你扔下我一个人说走就走
其实我也知道你很难受
只是这个世界把你我分两头
割断情思与占有
想起你我相爱的时候
想起只能在电话里头
我真的好伤悲好难受
不知道什么时候才是尽头
为什么相爱的人不能够在一起
偏偏换成了回忆
我带你的照片
找到海角天边
希望你会在出现
为什么相爱的人不能够在一起
偏偏换成了回忆
我就算忘记时间也忘记你
也忘不了我们有过的甜蜜
当你扔下我一个人说走就走
其实我也知道你很难受
只是这个世界把你我分两头
割断情思与占有
想起你我相爱的时候
想起只能在电话里头
我真的好伤悲好难受
不知道什么时候才是尽头
为什么相爱的人不能够在一起
偏偏换成了回忆
我带你的照片
找到海角天边
希望你会在出现
为什么相爱的人不能够在一起
偏偏换成了回忆
我就算忘记时间也忘记你
也忘不了我们有过的甜蜜
为什么相爱的人不能够在一起
偏偏换成了回忆
我带你的照片
找到海角天边
希望你会在出现
为什么相爱的人不能够在一起
偏偏换成了回忆
我就算忘记时间也忘记你
也忘不了我们有过的甜蜜

Feel like quitting cartel

I've just successfully completed registering my JAE registration form through the net. Finally I've got a chance to move on. Though compared to Poly, ITE seems to be a much less appealing choice but I guess I've no right to choose. Sigh. Wonder what lies ahead of me in my 2 years of ITE life. Will there be laughter, joy or will there be disappointment and tears of despair. I guess I shan't worried so much as no one knows what fate has planned for me.

Though we're eligible for up to maximum of 12 choices but I filled in only four choices as the rest failed to catch my attention.

My four choices of courses are:

Mission completed

Mission completed. Though things aren't so smoothly in the start but everything went pretty successful in the end. Now let's let the nature of cartel take it's course.

Anyway as expected my O level results cannot make it. Guess I go no one to blame except myself for being so lazy. Don't worry guys I won't do anything stupid to hurt myself. I brought this to myself, I chose this path so I've no rights to whine or complaint, I'll face my consequences.

Going to meet up with a teacher in NYP tomorrow morning. I don't think she can help much but no harm giving it a try.

Is it true that we'll become stronger when we're hurt?
Or I've turned numb?

New blogskin

Sigh. I've accidentally deleted the templates of my previous blog skin. I've lost all my links so if you guys would like me to relink you please kindly give me your links. Actually I planned to find something emo for my blog skin but recently I've been receiving complaints about how emo my blog is. So after much persuading and nagging from my friends I've decided to try something different this time round. I don't know why but I still prefer my previous blog skin as I think the previous skin suited my character. Guess I'll use this skin for my blog for the time being. So guys please give me some comments please.

Alright. Maybe I should try posting some happy stuff once in a while instead of the sad posts. Woke up around 9am today as Amelia's accompanying me for my haircut. After the haircut I brought her to my house as I need to take a bath. I regretted inviting her to my house as she discover quite a number of secrets in my room. Argh. After that we went to far east to shop for clothes for CNY. We shop for hours and as expected I bought quite a number of stuff. It cost me nearly $200! Wow. Guess I'm really good at spending money. 40 hours of work in cafe cartel gone in a day. Shit.

Anyway Amelia's coming to my house again tomorrow. I think I better get some sleep as tomorrow will be quite a tiring day. Yawn* Nitex guys!!!

Let fate do it's job...
We'll meet again will we?

Friends? What are friends for? You guys may say that friends are for life and they'll always be with you when you needed them. I doubt so. In my point of view friends come and go. We're just using one another to fulfill our needs. So it means that we are weak but what if we are strong, can we survive without any friends?

No matter how much of friends we have they'll still eventually leave us. No matter how close are we with our family, friends and as well as love ones we'll still be separated one day. When the day comes we'll be lying in either our tombstone or coffin alone....

Everyone is selfish including you and me. We'll always do things that allow us to benefit from it. When something or someone has truly ran out of usage we'll just throw them aside and let them rot for all we care. This may sound quite unbelievable and saddening to you guys but believe it or not this is the truth, this is reality. Face it. Face the facts stop being so naive guys.

Everyone and everything will eventually leave us one day and when the day comes we'll be left with nothing. Except for ourselves... So love only yourself and nothing else more...........

离别是既美丽又痛苦

It was fate who brought us together
and it was fate who tore us apart...

Another Emo Post

Are you guys happy with your life and satisfied with how things are? I don't know if you guys do feel the same way as I do but I'm sorry to say that I'm so not happy with my life, I'm not at least satisfied with how things are or even content with what I have.

I don't know why but I've got a feeling that there are some things that are missing in my life. I feel that life's pretty meaningless and I just really can't help feeling sad and empty most of the time. Trust me, I've tried my best staying cheerful most of the time but still I failed to do so. I've been trying real hard to look at things in a optimistic way but still I just can't help being pessimistic.

I really would like to make a difference in my life but how? I've wasted much time and I'm already somehow starting to regret it. How I wish that I'm just 13. It's true that we don't really get to do much things at that age but at least there's a chance for me to set things right. Who knows that maybe I'll be still in the express stream. Everything will be different if I had not dropped into the normal stream. Maybe I'll be happier, maybe.

Heard that cartel's cutting down manpower which means we don't really get the chance to work whenever we feel like it. I think that probably defeats the purpose of me staying in cartel as the main reason I joined cartel is because I get to work whenever I feel like it. So if they're really cutting down manpower then maybe I shall leave and look for another job. Maybe I should try either retail or sales. At least it'll be slacker and there'll be some commission. I guess I'm really a pretty spendthrift person as I've already started planning of what to spend on before I even get to receive my latest pay. Time and time again I've tried to remind myself not to be so spendthrift and time and time again I failed to do so. Hopeless.

Anyway I gave William my schedule for next week and it was like hardcore. I told him that I would like to work from 11.30am to 10pm from Monday to Friday and 8am to 5pm on Sunday. i wonder if he'll allow me to work during those timing. You guys may think that I must be crazy to give him that timing but sorry to say that I rather earn some money than spending my off day alone.

If it weren't for Khai Ying I guess yesterday would be another boring off days for me. Roaming around town alone isn't as cool as it sounds. I think its pretty pathetic and idiotic. Really enjoy going out with Khai Ying at least I need not have to put up much act like in front of her. Miss the old days.

Please take my loneliness away...

Boring. Thats all I can say about my life lately. I've been working for like five days a week for the past few months and I really do need to get my life back. Its not that I'm a workaholic or what, its just that I've no plans and no where to go during my holidays. The other reason that I work so much is because I'm in need of money desperately as I'm quite a spendthrift person. My friends are too busy for me too. They either got to attend school or work.

Sigh. I wonder how am I going to spend my day tomorrow. Am I going to be roaming around town alone again or what? Or should I go catch a movie alone? Sigh. Life sucks. Off days sucks. I'm indeed a loner. A loner for life. Argh.

Anyway feel free to visit this web http://freshlikelemon.livejournal.com/
They are trying to sell some comics at a affordable price. Though they don't really have much variety but guess there's no harm spending a minute or so browsing through their stocks. ^^

BAO FENG VS IMBA

A match between Bao Feng and IMBA was being held at around 10am today. Though the doctor told me not to engage myself in any vigorous sports for the time being but as expected I ignored her advise. Only 7 of us turn up today, as for the other team there were like more than ten of them. Their players are tall and are pretty good jumpers too. As my team mates and I were only like around 170cm tall. Our best jumper could not turn up for the match as he got himself into some police case. Everyone are quite worried for him. Hope everything will turn out fine.

Anyway back to the match. First quarter was a draw, we were behind by 4 points during second quarter, 12 points behind during the third and in the end we lost by 16points. Losing to IMBA is not surprising as I think everyone felt that we'll probably lost. At least we lost to them psychologically before the match even started. Everyone wasn't really in the mood for the match. As for me, my ankles didn't really allowed me to sprint and dash round the court. The slightest jump could even make my ankles hurt. I thought by enduring the pain for a quarter or so I would be used to the pain but I was wrong the pain got worse instead. I clashed with RATZ during the first quarter and injured my thigh. Now its kind of swollen now and I've problem walking. I really wonder if I should excused myself from work tomorrow.

Life have been pretty meaningless lately. I'm working most of the time and work have become boring. There's really nothing to do on off days as well. No exciting places to spend my day as well as no friends to go out with so whats the point of off days? Rotting.

You Are Pretty Happy

You generally have a happy, fulfilling life. But things could be a little better, and deep down, you know it. Maybe you need more supportive friends or a more challenging career. Something is preventing you from being totally happy. You just need to figure out what it is!

What Nicholas Means

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals. You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily. You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind. A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable. You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out. Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia. Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person. You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life. You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you. At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself. You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow. You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily. Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is. You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality. You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong. You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know. You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.

You Communicate With Your Body

This isn't as bad as it sounds, it just means that you're a "touchy-feely" person. You need a lot of affection in your life. And for you, this means both giving and receiving little touches. Warm hearted, you bond with people easily. In fact, you often feel a little sad when you're not in the company of others. A little moody, you tend to be controlled by your emotions. But a bit hug always comforts you!

Your Five Variable Love Profile

Propensity for Monogamy: Your propensity for monogamy is medium. In general, you prefer to have only one love interest. But it's hard for you to stay devoted for too long! There's too much eye candy to keep you from wandering. Experience Level: Your experience level is high. You've loved, lost, and loved again. You have had a wide range of love experiences. And when the real thing comes along, you know it! Dominance: Your dominance is high. It's your way or the highway when it comes to love. You like to be very involved in your sweetie's life. No question, you like to be the one calling the shots. Cynicism: Your cynicism is low. You are an eternal optimist when it comes to love and romance. No matter how many times you've been hurt - you're never bitter. You believe in one true love, your perfect soulmate. And if you haven't found true love yet, you know you will soon. Independence: Your independence is medium. In relationships, you need both "me time" and "we time." You usually find it easy to be part of a couple. But occasionally you start to feel a little smothered.