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Profile Nicholas 5thSept Virgo Music Click to help Tagboard archives
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Affiliates *My BLOGSHOP Alvin Amelia Chermaine Claria Esther Jaslyn Jassmine Jia qi Jolene Joshua Jun Ming KahKiong Kaiping Kristi Meizhen Nicole Phebe Samuel Shirlyn Siming Teresa Veron Vivien Xidi Xiuling Yang Zi Yong Rong Ziyi Credits You have to thank these guys for making such a Designer is CRUSHthespeaker . Designer's blog is here . Host is obviously blogger . |
Dec 27, 2007 10:01 PM Went to the chinese clinic this morning to check up on my ankles. As the pain on my ankles have been quite a hindrance during work and its pretty annoying as it really dampen my mood. The doctor told me that the reason my ankles hurt so bad it's because my old injuries have been accumulated for quite sometime. The doctor applied some acupuncture on me and it was pretty scary as it's the first time for me. After that she connect the needles with some wires and before I knew it some electric waves went through my ankles and feet. I thought that was all for today when she actually did some twisting, turning and pressing on my ankles! I was like OUCH! It lasted for quite sometime at least that was what I thought so. After the treatment the doctor asked me to keep away from vigorous sports, exercises, cold water and don't walk too much. I was like then how am I going to survive. First cold water is something I needed in my everyday life. Secondly there's an up coming basketball match on 5th Jan, I've been excuse from training due to this injury and I don't want to be excuse from the match! Third which is last but not least, walking is part of the things I need to do in my work how can I not walk a lot! Worse still I work long hours!
Dec 24, 2007 1:23 AM  Which is harder?To walk away, let go or to forget? No matter which path we choose, it ain't going to be easy. Anyway I've really a bad feeling about my ankles. I somehow think its some old injuries of mine. The pain's getting worse. Just can't wait to hear what the doctor got to tell me on Thursday after having her checking on my ankles. Hope it isn't some bad news. Wish me luck. Dec 20, 2007 12:37 AM First broken glass
Sigh. I can't believe I broke a glass today and it kind of ruin my mood. My clean record was like gone in that instant if it weren't for those bloody customers. Argh. Shan't talk about it anymore. Anyway I received my pay today and my pay was like more than I actually expected. I mean I only work like 2 weeks before the cut of date and I wasn't really expecting that much. Finally I'm able to clear my dept. Hope that life will get better. I'll rip those who threaten my life apart. Love are for weaklings... And I'm strong Dec 19, 2007 12:06 AM Maybe I should have took their advise seriously. Well I guess its never too late to stop now. Maybe it'll take sometime before I get used to it but I guess life is partly about how well can we adapt to our environment. Though I've lost some stuffs, some important stuffs but lessons have been learned and experience have been gained. So I guess maybe it's isn't that bad after all.
Trying to be optimistic for once. Dec 18, 2007 1:07 AM Work was as usual today. Boring's the only word for it. Time seems to pass so slow when we're working. Anyway, I think there's something wrong with my ankle. It always hurt after I've been working for long hours and the pain seems to get worse day by day. My mum asked me to go for a check up as she too thinks that there's something wrong with my ankle. I'm so worried for my ankle. I wouldn't want to stop playing basketball or skating. There's so many things that I would like to do. I don't want to be crippled?! I want to continue my Thai Boxing lesson and I would like to learn how to bboy. If I've the chance I would wish to fight in the ring!
Anyway didn't expect to see Davina at cartel. Wonder if she's there just to have her meal or is she there to find out some stuffs from me. Had a short chat with her and found out some stuff which make my temper boil. I don't know if what I did was right or wrong but I told her some stuffs that I had been hiding from her for this past few days. I just felt that I should let her know. As it's really isn't fair to her or me. At least that's what I thought. We had a chat after work and I found out lots of stuffs that were quite shocking and disappointing at the same time. We tried to figure things out but in the end we didn't really come out with any brilliant ideas. While Davina and I were like trying to come out with some stupid ideas to spite mike, Liang Hao and Ya Ting were like trying to stop me from doing foolish things that will make me regret. They were like telling me so what if I got my revenge or what. Will I be satisfied? Will it cease my pain? Yeah right! I'll be happy and it'll cease my pain but only for a short period of time. After sometime maybe I'll be regretting for the things I did. Maybe when time past and I look back I'll laugh at my own foolishness. Like what they said though it's expected that I'll be filled with hatred but hatred won't bring me anywhere, instead it'll bring me nothing but pain. So what's the point of making my life miserable, what for down grade myself in order to seek my revenge. Guess their persuading and talking do have some effects on me. They should be honored as nothing do really enter my head when I'm in pissed off mood. So I was really surprised that the words they said actually entered my head. Thanks for the food Samuel! As usual I was starving after work but was saved by the food that Samuel had brought for me. And he's smart! He gave me a big portion and ask me to share with Ya ting! How kind of him. I like his idea. XP Trying to stay calm Dec 16, 2007 11:33 PM Naive Maybe what Meiqi said was true. I'm indeed too naive. Its 21st century for god sake I should have been more realistic. If I've been more realistic none of this would have happen. If I've took some precaution and not trusted them completely none of this would happen. Everything will still be going well. At least I would like to think that everything will be fine. Like what Vivien said though I'm appeared to be alright but the fact is my heart's crying. I cried not just because I'm hurt or in pain, I cried because I'm disappointed that I was being betrayed. I was being betrayed by someone whom I least expect to betray me. What he said to me are just a pack of lies. Everything was an act. I should have known. I should have see it coming. God make me exceptionally sensitive for some reason and yet I did not make full use of my gift. I've no idea why I've a hard time suppressing my anger whenever I see her. I just can't pretend that nothing has happen and smile at her as though every thing's fine. Cause it's not. I'm just furious that how can she act as though nothing has happen in front of me. Worse still she's going after my best friend in front of me. How can they ignore my existence. I really hate them, I really do. How can he be enjoying, how can she be enjoying, how can they be enjoying while I'm here suffering in pain. Fuck I've should have known. I shouldn't have tried to run away from my fate, my destiny. For I'm destine to be a loner no matter what. After all nothing last forever. Be it relationship, kinship and as well as friendship. Everything will ends its just a matter of time. In the end we'll still be alone when we're buried in our graves. All of us will be long forgotten someday. A loner is what we'll become. Its our destiny our fate. Or at least that's mine. A loner I am, a loner I'll be, for I'll be alone for the rest of the eternity. Friends come and goes. So maybe its time for us to part. Maybe its time for me to leave. As I'm not needed anymore. I'm now only a hindrance to you while you've now become my pain. I don't really know if I did matter to her at all. Maybe it was just a game to her after all. Or was it just a crush? Somehow I need some more time before I could really face her. Or at least accept the fact that she's fallen for others. loneliness knows me by name Dec 15, 2007 8:01 PM Hatred
I'm beginning to get tired of this. When will it end? When will all my sufferings end? I'm sick and tired of being in pain. I thought that somehow, someday I'll be numb and get used to the pain that's always around me. But I was wrong. Time after time I got hurt again and again and it always hurts, it always do. And most importantly the wounds that have been inflicted on me always seems to hurt more than the previous one. I know that getting hurt is part of life and that's a fact that no one is able to run away from but if given a choice I really wish to be separated from pain and suffering. I always believed that we live for the sake of love, for the sake of seeking true love, love for friends, love for the things and people around us. And that's what supposed to keep us going when we are down or met with obstacles but now, how am I going to live or love if I'm completely filled with hatred, jealousy and the sense of being betrayed. Now hatred had successfully gain a complete control over me. I hate the things I once love, the trees, the white clouds, the cool breeze, the rain, my life and myself. Call me a weakling or what so ever. I know guys should be stronger and not whine over such stuffs but I think there's always an exception. Maybe I'm weaker than others, maybe all this stuffs are just too much for me, maybe I'm more sensitive, too sensitive. I've been thinking lately whether I'm in the wrong or whether I do deserve this. Or maybe he had some difficulties in explaining it to me. But after much thinking after trying to place myself in his shoes I still think that I'm not in the wrong! In fact I'm the victim. No one do deserve this, no one. I think he's just running away from problems and he chose to hurt me and the ones around him than to hurt himself. How selfish and cruel can he be. I should have know from the start. Despite being warned by other I still did not take their advises seriously. So now I guess I got to pay the price. Fuck Many things have happened during this year. I've been hurt pretty much this year compared to others. It's been a bad year for me, very bad. Many changes around me have been taking place, including me. I don't really know if I change for the good or for the worse but I just hope that everything would end soon. Be it this way or that way. I'm really tired of feigning a smile. Someone, somebody out there please show me a path and guide me for I'm lost.... I'm tired. When will I be allowed to rest... Dec 14, 2007 9:34 PM Betrayal thats what it is Love, Jealousy, Selfishness, Vengeance, Lust, Pride, these are what's putting our friendship at stake. I don't know how long can I suppress the anger in me. It's somehow beyond it's limit. Despair, Devastation, Lonliness, Emptiness, Pain these are what I'm being left with. Guess this is when the follower take the lead. Where I'm in charge. Where the follower overturns the leader. 一山不能容二虎 Will this crack in our friendship ever be mend or will it... Dec 12, 2007 9:30 PM You've broke our vow, our promise...
and that may cause us our friendship... Will it? Promises that are ought to know... vows that were unsaid... untold, unspoken of... But you ought to know... At least that was what I thought... Since before I knew it, you've become my greatest friend. Someone whom I can pour out my secrets and thoughts to. Someone who will always be there when needed. At least that was what I thought. I enjoy being one of your closest friends but I'm not sure if I'm the best. I don't really dared to pin high hopes on that. I'm just somehow satisfied with how things are. I thought living in your shadow will be something great. At least I'll know where I belong and when I see you I'll see me. But I'm wrong. Living in your shadow's may not be such a great thing after all. People do see you when they see me but they don't really see me in you. I'll be some stranger to them without you around. Without you around I'll be left with nothing. There will be no Nicholas. You'll be the hero while I'm the zero. And you always are the hero while I'm always the zero. I may be relying too much on you. Maybe it's time for me to break free. Its now or never... You've been a great friend. A friend that I could ever ask for. I'm really grateful for you've been there for me during my darkest period. But I need some time alone to think things through. I've been pretty vexed recently and I need a break. A break from the outside world. Felt like going missing in action again but I know you guys definitely won't approve to it. So no worries. Will our friendship pull through this dark period? Or will it be broken? For christ sake why is he doing this?! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Since when I was a child my hands have always been exceptionally cold than others. Sometimes when it's raining season or when I'm in a air conditioned room my hands will turn as white as a snow, my nails will turn into purplish grey and it'll be as cold as the iceberg. I wonder if there's a reason to it. Though normally guys should be warmer so they can give their mate warmth but for me I doubt that I can give my mate any warmth. And I think that by not being able to give any warmth I'm actually quite a failure. Dec 9, 2007 8:17 PM 8Dec07
Something big happened to me today. To some bad boys this may be some interesting stuff but to some people who dislike violence this may be something they wouldn't want to be a part in. For me its a bit of both. I think its interesting but if given a choice I would rather it do not happened again. Though its interesting as this things don't really happen everyday but there's a heavy price to pay for the path we chose. Think you guys may be wandering what actually happened. Lets just say that I got into a fight. Into a fight with my friend's boyfriend. With a fight against someone who's a head taller than me and 2 times my size. Call my reckless or insane for all I care. Though I do not wish to fight him but my pride's at stake. So how can I chicken off? A guy got to do what a guy got to do. Zi Yi asked me to join Meixuan and Daryl for buffet at her house. I was pretty reluctant to go at first as I heard from Zi Yi and others that he's quite sensitive and get jealous easily. So I was quite worried that Zi Yi's boyfriend may get jealous of me being too close to her. But Zi Yi and Mei Xuan's bf told me that it'll be alright, everything will be fine. So who doesn't want a free dinner? So I joined them in the end. I tried my best to keep a distance from Zi Yi but her boyfriend still think that I'm too close to her so it kind of piss him off. He became kind of work up and came pushing me around. We started arguing for a period of time and... fuck In a speed of light I was slapped. I tried to control my temper as I don't really want to put Zi Yi in a difficult position. Our argument went on, stares were being exchange and before we knew it we started pushing each other. After some pushing blows were being exchanged. I shall cut short about the fighting progress. Lets just say he's kind of tough as I tired kicking him once and it did not even scratch him. His height make it quite a challenge for me to reach him too. His strength was pretty strong as I didn't manage to break free from him when he grabbed hold of the collar of my shirt. Zi Yi and others were more worried about me than him as they were afraid I might get hurt as there's really quite a big difference in our size. Both of us suffered from some injuries after the fight. My ears bleed while his cheeks were kind of scratch from what I see. But Zi Yi told me that there's bruise on his cheeks and skins were kind of tore up in his mouth. I do not know if its true but I find it pretty exaggerating. Though I only managed to hit him once hard on his face but I don't really think my fists are that strong. He called for back ups after the fight and he promised me that I'll get chop. Don't really know who to call for so I called the cops and Mike. Within minutes Terence and Alnin called me. They were one of my few friends with back ups. But everything turn out fine when Zi Yi's bf came up to me to apologise and we exchange hand shake. After a while we met again to sort things out but this time round like a gentlemen with pleasant manner. We're now friends now I guessed. He told me that I could hang out with them if I've the time and even look for him when I'm faced with similar troubles like this. After what had happened I've got a feeling I'll turned into a more violent guy than before. I know it may sound weird but I'm quite excited about the fight I had with Zi Yi's bf. It's something I never felt before. I really wish to become stronger so that I can protect my love ones... Craving for more power... Power to destroy... Power to protect... Power to change destiny... Dec 7, 2007 12:34 AM Finally I've managed to learn how to handle 3 big plates at once. I didn't expect that I can handle 3 plates at once in such a short period of time. I only wanted to clear my station thats all as it's going to jam. To make things worse Mike whose my only server partner was busy attending to the customer and that means I was the only server! So I was somehow frustrated as the plates and drinks kept coming. So I tried handling 3 plates at once, I thought I would probably can't make it out of the kitchen within a few steps but to my surprise I find the plates quite stable than expected. So I somehow succeed in letting the plates reached the customer safely. Yippee!!
Though I manage to handle 3 plates at once but I've yet to master it. Anyway I can't believed that I fell in Cartel?! And that mean manager William went to tell everybody about it! How could he?! And because of that fall I've become one of cartel's legend. But lucky it was not peak hour if not it will be so bloody embarrassing. Then one of them give my fall a name and its called 小白的特技。So lame! And they even asked me if there's part 2! idiot They keep calling me xiao bai here and xiao bai there. ARGH! I got so many nick name in cartel. Its so fun working with them! I'm so used to falling down so I guess there will probably be part 2. Oh man... my life is simply full of falling..... wonder when can my life get better... Dec 6, 2007 12:30 AM The 100th post! PISCES WOMAN She likes to be in a dream world than to be in reality. She is weak and sensitive when it's come to "Love". She can cry if her best friend is breaking up, and she can be over excited when her friend gets a new boy friend who is a good looking and rich even it is nothing concerned her at all. You might be surprise to see that she is shy just because she is in love. More or less it will be in Pisces woman. She loves small animal and gifted in training animals. She has sixth senses and she can guess what will happen next, it's her nature. Even she has a good sixth senses, she can not pick or foreseen her own choice of lover. She can not tell if she meet a sincere guy or a one night stand guy.She likes to buy and pick her own cloths. She likes to dress cute and be cute. Pisces woman tend to be a good looking woman and she has a nice skin. Her hands and feet are small and soft. Pisces woman loves to shop for shoes as if she collects them. She is a hot lady that everyone wants her. Whether she has a man in her life or not , she will never try to over powered any man. It's not even in her thought. She thinks man can handle things better, and she will make her man feel that way. She is an easy going person, so being with her is easy. She is a confident woman and likes to make people who stay with her happy. She knows how to please and how to comfort a man. If something is wrong, she will try to make other people belief that it's must be because of someone else, not because of her love one. She will not push her man to be ambition but to make him feel like he should be happy with the way he is now. She is happy with you for what you are now. A Pisces woman , if she has a bad childhood, she will always remember it and it will make her a very unhappy person. She will pity herself and feel sorry for herself. She tends to hurt herself with out knowing it and so vulnerable to drugs (real drugs or just sleeping pills). She has many choices and you can never tell which path she going to take. If you love her , then hold her tight because she never knows why she did what she did or what she will do next. A complex character. You may think she is a shy innocent type and can not hurt anyone, then you are wrong. You might think she is a fragile person who needs protection, wrong again. She has been through a lot, a tough cookie. She is a dreamer and love the word "Love", so she is the type who will buy gift for anyone for any occasion, especially if it is a gift for wedding or an anniversary even for someone who she does not know so well. Be very careful if fall in love with Pisces woman. She can be a total different person before and after. She can be an angle before and later a witch, but everyone is not perfect, right? She will be soft and gentle most of the time, so not to worry. She is emotional and extremely sensitive when she frequently got hurt. She is the type who can cry her heart out. She can have a secret fear inside, when she says she does not need anyone. She badly needs someone to protect her, but sometimes she can hide that feeling by being stubborn. She likes to hide her shyness and her weakness from her enemy. She does not like to follow any fixed rules. She can be a good housewife if you know how to handle her. Many men will ask to marry her because she is a 100% woman. If she wants to be sweet, she is a real angles. LEO WOMAN She will stand out of the crowd on the street. Leo woman normally tall or rather tall. You will hardly see a short thick woman. When she walks she walk like a queen, confident and does not look around, though as if there is no one around her. She will dress in her own style not according to fashion. She is confident of what she choose to wear. Do not buy cheap cloths where they sell in dozen for her as a gift, she will hate it. Also do not buy cloths that do not reflect her confident personality. She likes unique and strange cloths and accessories. Being different is what she loves. If you want to know her, take times and be patient because she is selective about people she mingles with. She's open minded, but yet she is not letting people get to close to her easily. She likes sweet words and compliments, but not too much. She smiles with anyone, but inside she thinks she is borne to be a leader. She likes to be in control because it is in her nature instinct. She is a graceful woman , and she has a magnetic charisma, so expect tough competition. She is a very proud person, so do not do anything to challenge her confident. She can be mad and act like a hurricane, and later can be like an innocent kitten, but do not fall for her O.K. She remembers everything and likes to cherish her sweet memory, so if you find her old photo albums with her ex-boyfriend or love letters that will make you puke, take it easy. She is keeping her sweet memory does not mean she still in love with the old fool, so you do not have to panic. She will have many guys run after her, so if you have advantage of a good background family, or a famous last name, a successful career then it's a plus. She hates to be poor and she thinks love will not pay bills. She is a sport type and love sports. If you want to date her, prepare to spend big bugs, for your first dinner with her can not be a hot dog stand, but better be the best place in town. She is a generous person, so do not be surprise if she give you a gift more expensive than what you gave her. She likes extravaganza, no cheap gift, no cheap dinner please. Being poor or broke make her depress. If you do not have lots of money, be creative and make your own gift for her. It's unique quality and times spending making it for her is a big deal. You can think economical, but do not be cheap. I don't really know if these horoscope are really that accurate but I think its pretty true. Ya Ting the Leo women and Jolene the Pisces women. Both of them do have completely different character but they belong to me! Oh my. They're so gonna kill me once they read this. Though they've completely different character but it's nice working with them. I think beside from Mike they're also my favourite working colleagues. Really enjoy working with them. Though others may thought that I'm attached to either one of them but the truth is we're just friends! Saw some break dancers lately and I really do envy them. I wished that I could dance like them. I bet its must be pretty enjoyable to move with the beat. Maybe I should try picking up breakdancing course again but this time round I got to build up some muscles before I join any of the courses. Dec 5, 2007 1:55 AM 4Dec07
Had my hair reborn today and I think it looks kind of weird. Maybe I'm just not used to having my hair too straight. I think it look kinda gay. Bet Rachel's gonna call me names tomorrow and that is if I get to see her during work. Don't really know why but she really do enjoy making a fool out of me. That idiot. How could she say that I'm girly and to make things worst she told me that I'm more beautiful than her! No one asked her to act so manly! Anyway can't believe I got bitten by Jolene. They should have locked that brutal animal in the cage rather than having her out hurting people. Or they should either tape her mouth or have her on leashed at least she won't endanger our life. But its really fun crapping with her. Especially when it comes to the pinching and pushing part! Haha. The other Jolene was nice too. She's so sweet, so kind, so gentle, so fragile and so bloody thin. She's too gentle and she seems to be so weak! Really worried for her when she clear the plates. Oh ya! She's bloody talkative too and it remind me of Vivien in Gelare. Its nice working with her too. It's just that we guys will talk none stop when we're place in the same station. Let's just hope that Edward won't get jealous of me. Jolene and I are just friends. Though he told me he no longer have a crush on her but who knows. Anyway Mike and I got this feeling that Edward next target will be Ya Ting. Work is fun! Especially with them around! Manage to make quite a number of new friends there. Nice crapping with them. As usual I love to disturb the girls. Haha. Hope they'll stay in Cafe Cartel for a period of time as I wanna know them better. Hope there's more people joining us in Cafe Cartel. Of course it will be better if there are more girls. I'm used to being with girls I guess. Think that's explain why others say I'm girly. It's late now so I gotta go. Tomorrow working from 12pm to 8pm! Wonder if they need people to extend to 10pm. Cause I'll be please to extend! Dec 1, 2007 2:45 AM My Love Life
Out of curiosity I went into a relationship when I was only 13years old. I did not really get into a relationship because I love the girl. As expected I was too young to know what love is. I only know that those who are attached seems to be so blissful, happy and loving. I wanted to be loved, to be cared for, to know whats love is all about but I guess I was still too young to get a taste of what love is. We did not went out together as we were still young during that time and our freedom was being restricted.My first relationship ended before I knew it. I was shocked that she broke up with me. It only lasted for about 2 weeks! In fact if I did not recalled wrongly it ended during the tenth day. When I was 15, I fell for the girl next class. Her smile never fails to brighten up my day. I tried to know her better and get closed to her. I tried to conquer her heart but I failed. Friends told me not to give up and I don't want too either. I tried again and again and I failed time after time. Before I knew it 2 years has passed and I was rejected by her for the 14th time. The pain from rejection always seems to get stronger. As I was too weak to take any more blows so I gave up. During the 2 years of courtship she has always been the most important in my life. So I thought I may not loved again. I thought she'll always been most important to me. I went into my 2nd relationship when I was 17. We were just pure friends at first but some things are just beyond our control. After much persuasion from friends I decided to ask her to be part of me as there were rumors saying that she's fond of me. I sounded her for stead on the 14 of feb which is the valentine day. The reason I asked her on that particular day because I think seldom people have the chance to get attached on the valentine day and I wanted the number 14 always to be remembered. I wanted to remind myself not to be so foolish, I wanted to remember the girl who rejected me for 14 times. During the 2 years of courtship, the number 14 has become a part of me. I admit that I did not have much feelings for my 2nd ex the first place but feelings were developed when we're together. Times with her were happy though there were some unhappy moment. Till now I still remember the warmth of her hands. The way we held each other hands though it lasted for a short moment but it's not forgotten. We ended on the 7th of march. I broke up with her on our 3rd week as I did not felt any love from her. I was desperate for more care and concern then. A year passed and many things have happened. On the 9th of August I make a friend on that day. Never did I expect her to make a difference in my life. I fell for her unknowingly and we're unbelievable attach on our tenth day of friendship, 18Aug. I thank god for letting her into my world. She make my world revolves, she gave me a reason to live on, she let me know what's love is like. She make me felt loved and wanted. She make me felt something I never felt before. But sad to say good things don't last. Everything ended on the 4th day! She told me she's used to wiping her tears off herself. She chose her friends instead of me. She wanted more freedom. My world collapse when she left me. I've never felt so despaired before. Bloods and tears were shed for her. Tears that have been sealed up for 6 years run down my cheeks as though they were nothing. Though it may seems unbelievable but the days with her was the happiest thing I did in my life. Sometimes I really do wonder why god took her away from me? I wonder if she really did love me before? Are what she said just lies? All am I too bloody naive! The words she said to me will never be forgotten. Though time will heal but I'm sure scars will still me left. She'll aways be remembered. She's the only one who can bring me down. She's the only one who can hurt me so deeply. She's the one who create a chaos in me. Was being with her a mistake? If it is why must it be corrected!? And so I've become her 14th ex..... Tried many ways to forget her but somehow I still failed to do so. So I'm left with the last choice and that is to fall for others. I was attached with my 4th and last ex on the 2 Nov. Her birthday lies on the 14th of Oct. On our 4th day of friendship we were already more than friends. As everything happened faster than we thought so we did not really know each other well. My trust for her was extremely little. Our expectation for each other was different too. We kept having conflicts and we often quarreled. Feelings were developed for her faster than I thought too. And its stronger than I imagined. Though its not as strong as the previous but still she has the power to hurt me. Or am I just too weak, too fragile? She asked for a break up on our 18th day. As expected nothing last more than a month. Maybe I'm simply cursed. Or is 14 a bad sign for me..... 12:31 AM If that's what you wanted then so be it. I've no one to blame except for my own foolishness. Wonder who told me not to MIA. I wonder who told me not to avoid you? "We can still be friends." They are just a pack of lies..... Trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you never knew. I wonder, when you look into my eyes and watch my heart shatter, does it break your heart too, even crack it a little bit? There's this place in me where your finger tips still rest... your kisses still linger and your whispers softly echo... It's the place where a part of you will forever be a part of me. You've never felt pain until you've felt love. I was born the day I met you, lived a while when you loved me, died a little when we broke apart. It's always the same in every relationship, there is always one person crying and wishing to get back together, while the other doesn't even remember the things they've been through. I hate that I have to be the one who remembers every little detail while you can't seem to remember me at all. Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. |
